Acts 2 gives an example of the ideal model of the church family. They were
- dedicated to church life
- open to wonders and miracles
- shared everything they had generously
- met everyday to praise God and enjoy fellowship
- experienced a revival

The Fellowship of the Believers
42They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. 43Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. 44All the believers were together and had everything in common. 45Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. 46Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, 47praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.

i’ve been touched recently by the generosity of the church. if we shared generously with those in need, none of us should ever be in need. this a true model of love in the church and an acting out of what it means to be ‘family’.

i got a good idea from a small group tonight. i’ve been racking my brains trying to think of good topics to write about, but haven’t had that much come to me. i’ve been pretty much ruminating on similar thoughts for the past few months. but what we can do is that you can ask questions or post topics that i can write about.

if there’s anything that you want to ask about the christian faith, or issues that you would want clarify, write me a comment and i’ll do my best to do some research and answer it biblically and thoroughly.

let me know! i’m excited about this new project.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.

24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

last night, i was so anxious i feel like i barely slept. just having to think about job interviews, applying for jobs, getting assignments in on time, commitments i’ve made for the weekend, packing and driving back to sydney, having a friend over for dinner tonight, making a presentation at work today or tomorrow…

i might have overbooked myself in my excitement to finally be done with my rotations, but this anxiety is not healthy. God, help me to trust in you – calm my nerves!

please pray also for uni students taking exams/handing in assignments soon

credit to gene ark on flickr

i’ve spent almost a month in bega. these past weeks, life has been simple and my mind has been on a bit of a hiatus (not thinking of the things of the world NOR of God; just been a bit blank -perhaps just recovering from camden?)

a conversation i had last night broke me out of this mind hiatus. i was reminded of the vicious cycles that many of us are trapped in, and feel like we don’t have the power to break. we ask ourselves questions like, “why am i like that?” and “what is the point in trying if i know i’ll fail again?” i know friends and family who suffer from unresolved sin and issues in their lives – unfortunately the Spirit is quenched and satan takes advantage of our weak moments to ensure that we manifest our sinful nature again.

the million dollar question is, “can we break out of a vicious cycle?” it seems too hard, almost impossible. i thought that for myself. but i have now experienced victory in Christ. God CAN break the cycle, God CAN give you the power to break free. Ask for it.

One expectation NOT to have is to expect yourself to change overnight. praying to change doesn’t mean we won’t fall again, because chances are if it’s that big a problem to begin with in our lives, we will. but when you fall, remember that God does not condemn. an illustration from the pulpit is that a dad does not scold his daughter when she falls down after her first few steps in life; instead he consoles her, and in due time, he encourages her to try again. we can’t change miraculously overnight, but if we have resolved to walk towards God to become more like Him, then our baby steps and failures will eventually amount to success, through His strength. we can change, we can become more Christ-like, we can have the fruit (mind you, not fruits) of the Spirit.

why does God create us to have the potential for sin? there is always the argument of needing to give us free choice. also, i think in the ideal world, our capacity to sin can also be looked upon in an entirely different way as our capacity to enjoy life to its fullest (more on that later; it’s a bit abstract). in our lives, God desires for us to enjoy life to its fullest – but that is only possible when we are mature enough to make wise choices. how do we become mature? only through repenting from our failures, taking baby steps that eventually become bigger steps and breaking out of vicious cycles.

sometimes God requires us to take more drastic measures to break out of the cycle e.g. giving up something important to us because we know that it does not honour God. that usually means discomfort and displeasure for us. but God does honour these drastic measures, and He works to show His glory when we sacrifice the little treasures and thrones we have built for ourselves in place of a God who deserves it.

i thought i’ll end with a few verses:

James 1:2-4 – desire and pray for maturity so you might be able to enjoy the life that God means for us to enjoy
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10 -remember that God has the power to break the cycle, not ourselves
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Hebrews 12:7-11
Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

may God be given the glory and may we not give in to our weaknesses as satan does not deserve a single ounce of triumph, ever!

tibetians

what are things that constantly get you excited? regardless of your mood and situations?
i can think of a few:
*chick flicks
*shoes
*coffee
*dance music
*the weekend

i wonder whether thinking about mission constantly gets us that excited?

pastor pete sent out a video about the zhuang minority people group in china recently. the video link is here. the heading of his email was, “we can’t go, but can you?”

i was reminded of a similar mission video i made in 2004 about laos. when you make a mission video, the intention is fire up passion in people for mission work. and your constant prayer is that your video will be the way that God answers the prayer of the someone has been praying about direction about mission – whether to go? where to go?

it dawned upon me how fortunate i am. i am chinese – making it easier for me to reach out to asians (3 tiers concept) culturally and racially. i speak english – well enough to go overseas and attain a degree that could be useful in future. i am well-to-do and can afford to go anywhere in the world to work and study. i am well-educated – i have skills that can be useful in other societies. i am a christian – my aim in life is to tell people about Jesus. add all these together and i am in the perfect situation to reach out to the BILLIONS of asian people who have not yet heard the gospel!

i know i am not the only one who falls into this broad catergory. we are generation Y, not the generation of our parents who were mainly trying to carve a better life for themselves and their children. we are the generation that has been given so much and we are so spoilt! surely we can use these gifts for His glory, and not our own.

how many of us have spreading the gospel on our hearts every day?
how many of us go through life chasing after work, money, pleasures and selfish ambition?
how much can God work through us if we were more focused on spreading the gospel?
how many people can we share God’s love with? how many people can we disciple?
if only we stopped paying attention to our own desires and needs. if only we spent more time praying for others. if only we spent more time doing ministry, wherever we are, no matter when.

just some thoughts that have been on my heart and this song reminds me of them. how can we live as Jesus lived, right now? how much will our lives change if it was about winning people for Christ rather than uni/work?

the holes hammered into the chinese palace ornaments during WWII

“Adulterers and adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.” James 4:4

Hearing this from the pulpit last Sunday spoke to me about some recent family issues and my own battle with sin. The reverend made two points from verses 1-3: the reason why we fight with others is because of the battle within ourselves and this battle within occurs because we place our own desires above following in God’s ways.

In continuation with those two points, the third point was made from verse 4 (above): when we choose to be christians, we have to choose to reject our worldly ways. To me, this message didn’t come as much as a surprise because it’s something that God has been saying to me for the past 2 months already! My godsis had said to me recently that it is not possible to have one foot in the church/relationship with God/Christian lifestyle and yet have one foot in the world and all its pleasures. It’s just funny thinking about it because it can sometimes be so clear when God speaks and yet we can be so resistant to change!!

God has taken away many of the comforts and pleasures of my life in the past 2 months in Mongolia and overseas. It has been tough having no choice about that but I know only these tough times can mould and change me so I thank God for that. These are just a few of the things that have been happening recently: No ready access to internet and phone has taught me less reliance on these items and more discipline to spend time with God, even now when those luxuries are available. A constant nomadic lifestyle has been teaching me to build friendships with the people I live with (even if only temporarily) and to actually spend time getting to know them personally. Losing all my documents when my computer crashed made me ask myself whether the reason I was so upset because I lost all my work that I was so proud about… it is obvious I seek to glorify myself!

The other thing I noticed from this passage is that the bible often mentions our friendship with the world as adultery. Adultery is a sin that perhaps the best of us think we will never succumb to; however, the flesh is weak and a love relationship with our current world will eventually poison our own minds to thinking sexual immorality, drunkenness, hedonism and materialism are acceptable and permissible, which is directly contradictory to God’s commands for us to hate the world and all it parades.
The battle within us that rages between our own sinful desires and God’s ways for us is so real that we can only turn to God in prayer, meditate on His word day and night and flee from temptation to truly glorify God. Any other ideas?

I have also been thinking of reading the book in the bible that Paul talks about the sin that he constantly struggled with (but never specifically mentioned). Can someone please tell me which book that is? (lotsa luv and thanks!)

it’s highly ironic that i was just about to blog about this last night when i am now confronted with a pretty humongous decision to make myself tonight. all of what i was going to say suddenly seems to become like mere head knowledge instead of something i myself want to put into practice! there’s a hypocrite when u see one.

nonetheless, i will write about this and hopefully this will be something i can follow thru with for this decision.

how do we make decisions? there are small ones daily, some of which might have implications for the future. and there are the huge ones, with a guarantee to be life changing. what do we do?

1. we stop being anxious
2. we pray and ask
3. we give thanks to God

after we pray, God can speak to us in many ways. He can speak through a passage from the bible that just jumps out at us, through consistency of what our christian confidantes advice us, through signs or visions or dreams.

the following are personally how i feel God has spoken to me in the past:
1. opening and closing doors – this just means that certain opportunities and options become unavailable to me, and that’s how i know it is not God’s will for me, though these might be things i desire for myself. other opportunities might come up, things that i don’t expect but are so well-placed and on thinking, perfect for me.

2. peace in your heart – it sounds so simple but with difficult choices, we are often full of tumult in our hearts and we can’t think of anything else. however, when we make the right* choice, we are filled with great peace that the decision was right. it sits well with us.

it’s not easy to sit and listen for direction when there’s such great anxiety, so pray.

*right: glorifying to God; in accordance with God’s will for our lives.

“Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me, and know my anxieties; And see if there is any wicked way in me, And lead me in the way everlasting.”
Psalm 139:23-24

When I was in Mongolia, a common response I would hear from the Mongolians was “God knows!” in response to when will you get married? Do you intend to keep teaching? What plans do you have for the future? It almost became a catchphrase whenever anyone asked me whether I was going to return to Mongolia.. God knows! As much as it seems like just an easy way out of the question, it is in fact the whole truth!

It’s hard to know at this point what God’s plans are. In fact, it is hard for anyone to know, and whether or not we will be obedient is another thing. Post-mission trip, I was confronted with certain issues in my own life. They weren’t problems that I knew really existed; perhaps I had gotten so used to saying that they were “just my personality” or “just a part of my life” that I hadn’t realised that they weren’t things that I had completely taken control of and left God out of the picture.

God loves us and in relationship with us, He desires us to surrender our lives completely so we might not worry (Matthew 6:25-26), we might trust Him that He knows best for us (Jeremiah 29:11) and we would stop pursuing the things on earth that are useless (Matthew 6:19-20).

I’ve been reflecting on Psalm 139 because I can ask God to search my heart to show me clearly what isn’t right before Him. The deepest, darkest thoughts.. He knows. What I think is acceptable, He might not. So only God can reveal these things and make us willing to pray the prayer for Him to take full control.

leaving mongolia was hard, especially with friendships formed and how encouraging it was being there. i knew leaving mongolia meant going back into the “real world” as well, and there was a great challenge in that.

in shanghai i managed to experience a bit of the ministry there and it was different because everything was underground. it’s hard to be in a place where worshipping god is not freely allowed.

as we all know, the post-mission time can be a hard one. there are trials and temptation. but God has been good and He is always faithful so there is great strength in that! i’ve learnt much from this trip including the power of crying out, God’s forgiveness, that worrying is a sin, direction on certain issues in life, how to deal with sin, overcoming challenges as a missionary etc. it’s been amazing learning all these things. i will write more in detail soon.

back in sydney next week